Baby showers are like going to hell and back again for an infertile, but when I got pregnant it was something I was *really* looking forward to. I was going to be the honoree and we'd be celebrating MY babies. It would've been a dream-come-true! One that, unfortunately, never happened.
Now, I understand that having one in my hometown would have been impossible, and I am NOT upset that I didn't have one there. One of my cousins wanted to make me one, but it was a logistical impossibility. And that's ok. But I am upset that none of my friends in my community here thought to make me one. I adore my friends and they have done so much for my family--from making us food for over 6 months to taking me to and from doctor appointments to visiting me to helping us clean for Pesach, etc. I honestly don't know what we would do without them. But, no one thought to make me a baby shower. My former co-workers also said they were going to make me one and never did. And honestly, I don't think they ever really intended to make one.
It's really not about the presents for me (although they're always welcome) :-), it's about celebrating the babies and what miracles they are. Orthodox Jewish people don't have baby showers before babies are born, but I know that people have them afterwards. I realize that the economy is making money tight, so I wouldn't have even been disappointed if there were no presents or just a diaper cake or something. And I realize that there are a ton of babies born in our community every year and not many people have showers (I know they exist because I was actually planning to go to one while pregnant but then went on bed rest), but most people are already on their 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th, etc. kid! These were my first (two) and after two long and hard years of infertility, which most everyone in my community knew about. And I definitely don't expect baby showers for any future kids, so now it's something I've totally missed out on, and it just makes me so sad. :-(
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