Sunday, May 15, 2011

Really Depressed

I'm really depressed about something that's been happening lately, and even though I know the people involved read my blog, I just need the support right now regardless.

First of all, the woman who takes care of the twins on a daily basis is one of my best friends. I love her to pieces because we are so similar, so it's almost as though she's an extension of myself. When something good happens to her, I'm as excited as if it were my own happiness. And when something bad happens, it's as if it happened to me as well. But here's the problem... For some reason some family members got a bad impression of her during a visit to us, and they want me to stop using her as my "day care". At the moment she is doing this "day care" out of my home and also watches 1-2 other kids during the day along with the twins. In Massachusetts there is no problem with this and it's really like having play dates over rather than a true day care. (Actual day care is defined in Massachusetts law as 6 or more children.) These kids' families are also friends of ours, so it's not like she's taking care of strangers. These family members became concerned that we're liable if anything should happen to any of these children (or the "babysitter") since day care is held at our house. This idea is preposterous to me, since we are all friends and would you ever sue a friend because a kid fell down and got hurt at their house? Of course not! Kids are kids and they get hurt. When Dovid hit his chin and needed to go to the hospital, did I blame anyone? Of course not! He's a toddler and he's going to injure himself. And the babysitter is a grown woman. She can take care of herself and would never blame me for her own injuries - unless the ceiling caved in.

Updated to add: I just checked my homeowner's policy, and I'm covered for $300,000 for personal liability (per occurrence) and $1000 of medical payments to others (per person), should something happen in my home. But in Massachusetts, everyone is required to have medical insurance so that $1000 really doesn't matter.

Anyway, I think you have the picture. I'm completely distraught over this because I love my best friend and I love these family members as well. I don't want anyone's feelings to get hurt, and I certainly don't want to put my best friend out of a job for no reason. I think she does a fantastic job with my kids, and in one of my next posts I'll tell you about the twins' early intervention assessment from last week. In an nutshell, they've made so much progress over the last 6 months that they no longer qualify! I attribute almost all of that progress to my friend's amazing teaching skills. Why would I want to give that up and lose a perfectly wonderful friendship to boot? But on the other hand, I don't want to lose this family either. Without their support, I don't know what Shmuel and I would do. I've been crying about this, and my stomach has been in knots for days. It's just too much stress for me, and I don't know how to handle it. Someone please wake me up from this nightmare!
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